EpsilonEta Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 Location: A06 – Guinevere Tags: Spying, Military, Building Dust Demon base Raven have been promoted to squad leader and made another successful raid on Kawashita. She is now being flown to the Demons main base to meet with there leader, the Commodore. (the space ship is a mikro version of the Wasp) As she steps out of the dropship she can confirm they are on Guinever. She think to herself. A06, that's fantastic, I don't even need subspace communication. And because of the MANTIS present the Kawashita force here is even more armed and alert. When Koro have found and stopped the insider all I need to do is get a radio and alert the local Kawashita troops. The Captain escort her through the base. Raven take the opportunity to ask: So, who is this Commodore? He's a war veteran, a military genius. Tried working for MANTIS for a while when there was no war but he thought they ware too soft and company-ish. He started the Dust Demons about a decade ago and now we are feared space pirates in another galaxy. They reach a large door guarded by elite Demons. I'm here with the new squad leader. She is to meet with the Commodore. The guards let her in, the captain stays at the door. So, you are talented new recruit I've been hearing about. I'm called the Commodore. Sarah Connor. Raven shake his hand. Meta: Obviously “Sarah Connor” is an alias, not Ravens real name. As it was discussed recently I want to say I have no problem with critique. Say what you want (or nothing at all) I won't take offense. Quote
Kodan Black Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 The micro build is good, especially the hangar. The micro Wasp was very recognizable, not sure if you had planned a micro version all along when doing the original's shape or just got lucky. I like your entry door area, I might have extended the floor a few studs more just because it feels a bit cramped. The command console is well done, very sci-fi. The flipped over plate for the floor works really well. You've got a very captivating story going. Quote
Commander Turtle Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 These are very good vignettes. Slight critique with the storytelling, keep all the "meta" stuff to the end unless absolutely necessary. I'm trying to get involved in the story, I can find out it's a microscale Wasp later! It would also be nice to have more of the "story so far" summary at the top, one paragraph where you say how Raven has infiltrated and trained with the Dust Demons, and last week fed information back to Koro. Now she is visiting their HQ for the first time! It doesn't have to be long, but it should say enough that we could have not read your earlier stuff and still understand what's happening Sarah Connor is definitely a Terminator character, the Dust Demons will be making jokes at her all week! Quote
Legocity2713 Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Although I do enjoy writing on my downtime, I'm not part of this group writing or what not, so I'm of no help as far as critiquing the story, but the build is nice. petty cool technique with the SNOT base. Gives some cool detail and texture. you don't see it done often, and its even rarer to see it pulled off right. So good work. :thumbup: Quote
mccoyed Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Great work, Ep. So the head of the snake is revealed at last. Quote
mrcp6d Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 The mix of studs and SNOT are interesting in the micro build, but I'm not sure the studs work for micro in this manner--especially with sand. Curved slopes work really well for dunes both at minifig scale and microscale. I do really like the shape of the hanger though! Also, big time NPU on the big tan pieces you used for the wall. Race track of some sort? Quote
Mike S Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Great job on the micro! Also the Commodore's desk is way cool! Quote
EpsilonEta Posted July 9, 2015 Author Posted July 9, 2015 (edited) Thank you! (I don't respond individual to positiv comment as it get unnecessarily long, hope you don't mind) The micro build is good, especially the hangar. The micro Wasp was very recognizable, not sure if you had planned a micro version all along when doing the original's shape or just got lucky. I like your entry door area, I might have extended the floor a few studs more just because it feels a bit cramped. The command console is well done, very sci-fi. The flipped over plate for the floor works really well. You've got a very captivating story going. It was luck. The wasp got very bulky so it worked well as a mikro. I would have extended the floor too but I ran out of tan after building the mikro (after photographing and editing I realized I had Jaba's palace in my sort pile but was to lazy to redo it then) These are very good vignettes. Slight critique with the storytelling, keep all the "meta" stuff to the end unless absolutely necessary. I'm trying to get involved in the story, I can find out it's a microscale Wasp later! It would also be nice to have more of the "story so far" summary at the top, one paragraph where you say how Raven has infiltrated and trained with the Dust Demons, and last week fed information back to Koro. Now she is visiting their HQ for the first time! It doesn't have to be long, but it should say enough that we could have not read your earlier stuff and still understand what's happening Sarah Connor is definitely a Terminator character, the Dust Demons will be making jokes at her all week! Good point, I will remember that in the future (and possibly change this one but dont have time now) Well, the Terminator series is 1800 years old by now so I don't think a lot of people remember them The mix of studs and SNOT are interesting in the micro build, but I'm not sure the studs work for micro in this manner--especially with sand. Curved slopes work really well for dunes both at minifig scale and microscale. I do really like the shape of the hanger though! Also, big time NPU on the big tan pieces you used for the wall. Race track of some sort? I thought the studs gave some texture to the sand, good to get another perspective. The big tan pieces are from a race track thing but I got them cheap on BL, thought they would get great walls. Edited July 9, 2015 by EpsilonEta Quote
marcu22 Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Nice, that Micro-Hangar is my favourite part! Beside that, the floor-design with the inverted plate is creative. This could probably get improved with some pattern. Have to try it myself once ;) Btw: Is famous outside of Germany? Haha Quote
SpacerSteve Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Great build. It has been very interesting watching your story progress. Quote
LittleJohn Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Very nice builds! I really like the micro landing pad Quote
aeralure Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Love the micro - especially the landing pad outlining! Some nice work in the other scenes too. Quote
shmails Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Nice work, I really like the upside down plate as ground, works very well! The door scene is well done as well, the shapes and colors work nicely, but I would try to figure out how to eliminate that gap that shows light through the wall. It kills the illusion a bit. Otherwise this is a great entry! Quote
Graham Gidman Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Great work incorporating multiple scales! Quote
narbilu Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 I luv it. Especially the combo of the micro build and the zoomed in scenes. Quote
Kai NRG Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 Great job on these builds, especially the door one! The tilted plates are a great way to introduce some variety into the door frame! I'd suggest though that in the future you try to eliminate the gaps where the white paper can be seen behind the build - usually not a difficult task, just add a black wall behind! Quote
Big Sal Posted July 11, 2015 Posted July 11, 2015 This is a great story to follow! Nice micro to get things started! I particularly like the way you've done the micro arch by the landing pad - simple but effective! Quote
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