PTV contest entry: Small

[Majek]

Vig. 28d

Hello there!

Here is my entry for the small catagory of the contest.

Piracy and the Slave Trade

Captain Roger is buying some new slaves.

Deeplinks:

1

2

3

4

Aarrgghh!!

~Majek

Edited November 14, 2009 by SlyOwl

[Lt. Col. Thok]

Very nicely done. Where are the square banners from?

[Majek]

Where are the square banners from?

3829 Fire Nation Ship ;)

[Zorro]

My opinion:

Looks good and on topic, Majek! And I love the Fire Nation's banners.

Possible improvements:

1) Maybe the slave trader's face could look into the lens? I think that would be better, and are you certain about that head you used for him/her?

2) No gold coins for Captain Roger? Is that silver/gold he is paying with? In that time gold and silver was mostly molded into bars, but then again: this is only a minor issue.

3) Epaulettes without a uniform? Well, I guess it's mainly for the looks...

4) A crying face for the woman-(sex?)slave might be better suited to represent cruelty .

5) A parrot on top of the leaves (on that free dot) might look good too, since it adds to the color pattern.

Non-brick related advise:

1) Typo: buiyng should be buying

2) A small story always looks nice.

Edited October 26, 2008 by zorro3999

[Guss]

that's a really really nice little entry , this is the most original I saw for now, and it's really well done ! I love it

I wish you the best for the contest !

[Adam]

My opinion on the creation:

A great idea for an entry, Majek! The Fire Nation banners look marvelous in this situation, and you have a great use of legs, torsos, and minfigure accessories all around.

Some improvements you can make:

1. Zorro3999, I think he is supposed to be holding a silver coin, not some random block of gold. However, using a standard coin, or perhaps a gem, would probably look a little nicer.

2. I think that the foliage over the slave "pen" would look much better if it was pushed over to the left so that it covered the MOC a little more.

3. Is the slave dealer's chain attached to anything? Perhaps if it was connected to the female slave, it would terminate any confusion.

4. The path could do with a touch more grey in certain areas- the one plate seems out of place, like a tiny patch of sand in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, if you know what I mean.

Other than those minor points, I think that this has one great chance at winning the small catergory! I can't wait to see a medium and a large entry from you, based on all of the other vigs I've seen from you.

(Anyone notice that I've changed my post style to mimic others? )

Edited October 26, 2008 by Adam

[Majek]

Thanks for all positive comments and for the feedback people!

[Erdbeereis]

You've done an excellent job on your entry Majek! I must say that it's my favorite small entry so far!

The colors are very vibrant and the idea is very "creative"! Like the others have said, the banners on top look excellent and really add a lot to the entry.

Improvements you could make are:

1) The one dark grey plate and round grey plate in the path look a bit out of place. You could either add a few more dark grey plates to give it more balance, or you could use solely light grey.

2) Adding a parrot to the top of the palm leaf would look great and match the colors used in the rest of the entry very well.

3) The silver stud that's meant to be a coin looks a bit too much like the path. It almost looks like he picked up a piece of concrete and is trying to pay with it. Changing that to a normal LEGO coin would look a lot better I think.

Other than those minor points, you've done a fantastic job with this and so far, it has my vote!

[Legoking]

Opinion

This is a very detailed small MOC you have got here. I like your idea of having a slave auction. Those banners that you got there fit your MOC very well. Are those banners from Avatar Lego? The tiles on the wood look very nice. I like that you included the Indiana Jones whip and backpack. The expression on the male slave is good. He looks very angry and anode.

Possible Improvements

1) You should tile the rest of the ground instead of having some non-tiles in there.

2) You could have the pirate holding a rainbow parrot or put it somewhere in your MOC to add some more color.

3) You could give the woman slave a screaming face instead of a normal one.

4) The pirate is trading with silver? Exchange the silver with gold coins.

5) Add some blood by the slaves or something because you are lacking blood.

Non-Brick Related

1) There should be some kind of story or a plot.

2) Spelling error: buiyng, should be buying.

3) Don't have deep links; add those pictures to your entry topic. You are allowed up to 6 pictures anyway.

Overall- This is a good MOC and I like the Fire nation banners a lot. Some small minor improvements, but other than that, it is great. I wish you the best of luck!

LegoKing

My PTV Entry- Medium

[Majek]

Thanks a lot! Really good advices. I will try to improve my

vignette and eliminate mistakes.

~Majek

[AL FREDDO]

great stuff,majek