halixon Posted April 9, 2016 Posted April 9, 2016 1993, May 3rd. Now, my story begins. It was a simple day. I worked at an experimental florist greenhouse. We engineered chemically enhanced, and hybrid plants. We've contributed to several medicines and bio-technologies. I was taking a load of compost for the plants early in the morning, when i heard a ruckus around a corner. A man was holding a gun to my boss. "I swear to heck i don't have it!" he yelled. "Just give it to me, Drahn." "I told you, i don't have it!" then, the trigger pulled. The man then turned to me, as i stood there, stunned at what i had just seen. Before he could open his mouth, i said "What... did i just... see." he lowered his gun before he spoke. "You just saw a man who was about to leak a secret organization to the public die. And now you're involved." I still stood there, staring at the scene. "You've seen too much to just go freely, but you're not involved with the leak, so i can use you." he said, hand still gripping the gun. "I... what?" i said, nervously, with an obvious shaky tone in my voice. "You just saw a threat to my organization die, and you can't un-see it. Now you have to come with me, so you can't tell anyone of this." he looked at me with a straight face. "Why would i go with you? I have a normal life, and a job." he shook his head. "Not anymore. Your boss just died, and your life is no longer normal. So the best thing to do is come with me." I pondered what to do. I thought about taking him down, but he had the gun. I resolved to at least go with him to see what the big deal was. "A..alright. I'll come, but at least put your gun away." he nodded, and then we headed out of the greenhouse. Part Two - The Orginization We walked to the edge of town, into a forest. We came across a clearing, where a geological measurement setup was. "Two years ago, the Society of Geological Safety scouted this clearing, and they detected unusual readings under these grounds. They dug around the area, and found this manhole, which leads to our hidden base. We eliminated all of them, before they could post their finding on the paper." he walked down to a hatch with a turning handle. He slowly turned it, and it opened with ease. "Let's go in." he said, and i followed. After a single, sewer-like hallway, we went through a door, and on the other side, was a rich, polished hall, with several displays. "We're here. Now let me do the talking." We walked down the hall for ten minutes before we came up to some double-doors. Guards in black suits and fedoras blocked several doors. They all had guns in the backs of their pants. I felt nervous. Once we stepped up to the double-doors, one of the guards said "Halt! Dr. Rain, who is the outsider?" he asked. "This is a victim of the conspiracy. He saw me take out a leak ally, but he's not affiliated with them, so he'll have to work with us. Alright, i need to speak to the boss." he said. "You may pass." the guard said, stepping aside. Before we walked in, Dr. Rain turned to me. "What's your name?" he asked. I was hesitant, but eventually answered. "Lucas Green. For short, Luke." "Alright, Luke. We're about to speak to our boss, who told me to kill that man earlier. We're going to find out what work he has for you." Rain said. "Alright..." and i followed him in. (OOC) Alright! Chapter One is up! Up until a certain build, Luke's story is all in the past. When that chapter is posted, what happens in all future chapters will be determined by you guys! Until then, look forward to Chapter Two, which will be up either tomorrow or monday! ~Windusky Quote
gamejutzu Posted April 11, 2016 Posted April 11, 2016 (edited) Nice little story you have going there. Looking forward to see where it goes. I myself feel a little mixed with the mini-builds. They look nice, bit if you're going to use a mini-build for your settings, try to pack more detail in them. After all, it is a minibuild. Edited April 11, 2016 by gamejutzu Quote
halixon Posted April 11, 2016 Author Posted April 11, 2016 Nice little story you have going there. Looking forward to see where it goes. I myself feel a little mixed with the mini-builds. They look nice, bit if you're going to use a mini-build for your settings, try to pack more detail in them. After all, it is a minibuild. I understand your thoughts. The latter build was a but rushed. The next build will have more detail. And the small builds will be a recurring theme, because it's a 16x16 vignette series. Quote
Exetrius Posted April 11, 2016 Posted April 11, 2016 The story has a nice vibe to it, and the builds are decent so far. The base entrance is my favorite of the three. However, like gamejutzu said, your vignettes could use just a tad more detail or special parts usage. Anyway, keep it up! Quote
iammac Posted April 11, 2016 Posted April 11, 2016 Story is progressing well. Interested in who this boss is. Why would he light a fire next to the entrance to his lair? "Hello! Secret Base right here!" Still hoping Tony Stark Dr. Rain is not a villain... Quote
halixon Posted April 11, 2016 Author Posted April 11, 2016 Still hoping Tony Stark Dr. Rain is not a villain... You have no idea... Quote
iammac Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 One more thing, I wonder at the connection between Green's name and his former occupation in a Greenhouse.... Quote
halixon Posted April 12, 2016 Author Posted April 12, 2016 One more thing, I wonder at the connection between Green's name and his former occupation in a Greenhouse.... I actually never realized that. O_O but maybe i can incorporate it later. Quote
gamejutzu Posted April 12, 2016 Posted April 12, 2016 I actually never realized that. O_O Lol Then what was the inspiration for his name? Quote
halixon Posted April 13, 2016 Author Posted April 13, 2016 Lol Then what was the inspiration for his name? I was just spitballing names. Quote
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