Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Tee-Hee! OK! Helena, you did tell us to lynch you if Godric was town, so don't go telling us how townie you are, you're being a fatass hippo liar, and we all have a good reason to lynch you regardless. I don't honestly know how you expect to survive today. You say you know you won't be lynched, with your 100% surity again. I have no idea how you think that, unless you have some sort of megablocking scum spell, which I hope you don't. Last time she was 100% sure it was all megablocks, so I would take her threats with a grain of salt. Keep digging a hole, speaking without knowing. Like this one, here. Nice to know you're still making vague insinuations about some knowledge you have that we don't without telling us anything helpful. You have fun with that.
Rutherford HablabbleBibble Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So....it's been a couple hours. Have you come up with/answered anything yet, Helena? At this point I'm ready to lynch your wrinkley gray asp out.
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So....it's been a couple hours. Have you come up with/answered anything yet, Helena? At this point I'm ready to lynch your wrinkley gray asp out. We all are, Rutherford!
Timly Dimplebop Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Helena, While your actions and words today don't exactly scream scum, they certainly aren't town. Deceitfulness and arrogance are not qualities anyone will respect. Even if you have all the answers, as you so claim, who would care? Although this is a first for a defense that I've seen.
Hinckley Posted May 5, 2013 Author Posted May 5, 2013 Interlude You may now vote. You have 48 hours to reach a conviction.
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Vote: Helena Hippopaw Don't care what comes, Hell or high water, this vote is not being unvoted!
Nicholas Dickory Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Will this come as a surprise to anyone? Vote: Helena Hippopaw
Twatty Tittlesteen Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Vote: Helena Hippopaw One of the few occasions a bandwagon is actually good.
Helena Hippopaw Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Alright, the time has come. The Helena Hippopaw story must be told. It begins in the plains of Africa... Wait, too far back? Fast forward... Timly calls me arrogant for not properly respecting the inanity coming out of Gertrude's highly inane maws. Ah, snap. The smartest of the bunch must have been offed already, leaving the less cognisant ones. In that case, let me break it down into an Arrowroot digestible style for the mental midgets left over (and sincerest apologies to the non-mental midgets here; you are totally fine in my book, but the day has been monopolised by the vocal and stupid today. I am in no way painting all of town with the same brush). Helena Hippopaw's Great Reveal, A Play on plays Day Zero, roles are revealed. Two characters, shrouded in shadows, discuss their roles. 1: Twinned SKs? That's pretty dumb. 2: Yeah, the last ****** games, the SK was way overpowered, so this is the opposite, giving the SK to two players, but none of the benefits. 1. Who gives a shit? The SK is supposed to be unwinnable, so screw it, we are agents of chaos, favouring neither side. 2: Sounds fair. What's your strategy? 1: I'm going to act and type like a noob. It'll kill me to write such incomprehensible English, but those types always get to day five. 2: Good call! I'm gonna barely post and look scummy all the time, it should work. 1: Um... The two step into the light, and we see Purpolonia Pink and Helena Hippopaw! Shocking! Day One Helena: Who should we kill using our combined action? Pink: Eh, whatever. Helena: How about whatever his name is, the guy we kill? Pink: Yeah, sure, whatever. They won't be watched. Day Two Helena: Ariattny is a total douche. We should kill them, just to avoid having to read their crap. Pink: Yeah, Ariattny's kind of funny though. Who else? Helena: Catalina's playing. Why not them? Pink: Whatever. Day Three Helena: Post! Take part! You're going to get lynched! Pink: Huh? My acting scummy thing didn't work? Screw! Helena: Do something! Pink: I sort of am! Helena: We're paired together, so we die together. I'm gonna save you. <Helena claims something utterly vague> Helena: Scum will not touch either of us if they're intelligent. Let's see. Pink: Awesome. Thanks. Day three, scene two: X: I'm the doctor, I'll protect you! Helena: Cool! Day three, scene three: Y: I'm the vig, who should I target? Helena: Nobody! Too risky! Think of the town <snicker! > Day three, scene four: Z: I'm totally not the watcher, but I speak for them. I won't watch you tonight, but I'll let you know you were watched tomorrow. Helena: Sure, sounds good to me. You do that. Day Four Godric: Hi, I'm Godric! I've done nothing useful so far, but I will shit on everyone to feed my ego! Everyone! You're useless! Useless! I want to destroy the town! Helena: Sure thing Godric, you go do that! ~End day four ~ So, some of you may have learned I am not town through that. Even the small-brained of you, such as Godric, the noon-lynch leader. Now, the question is: why not lynch me? Well, you have two options: 1. Lynch me, and doom town. 2. Not lynch me and have a chance. Why would lynching me doom town? Because I will reveal the identity of the doctor, vig and watcher if you try to lynch me. I'll do so about an hour before day's end. In that case, town will be 100% doomed to lose. Kill me, kill the town. If you keep me alive, I'll keep it secret, and hope to be here day six, hoping that the scum hope to find a reason to not make me the kill night four. The question is, will you negotiate with terrorists? Well? Godric, you think you are a leader, want to lead the town now?
Helena Hippopaw Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 For the record, without Pink, I cannot kill, therefore I cannot win. But I'm a sporting person who wants to see the game continue. That includes me in it.
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Policy lynch for being a dick. Bad sportsmanship is hardly the way to go in these games, and I'll bet that Hinckley will either tell you you can't do that or nobody will let you play in their games in the future because you throw temper tantrums when you don't win. My vote stays where it is.
Twatty Tittlesteen Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Everyone, let me suggest some other lynch options. I for one, will likely vote for Firuz today, shortly. However, if there is nobody else you would like to lynch, I volunteer myself as a possible lynch subject should there be nobody else worthy of lynching. I am willing to risk my life for the rest of the town should it be necessary, such as a similar situation. I am vanilla, so you won't lose anything important should I be your verdict. I would love to survive, bit seeing that Helena is likely telling the truth, the town is in danger, and I want to lead the town to victory. As much as I hate to say it, if this is the only way to save the town, I will do it. Helena, please provide anything you know. If you are unwilling to, I will be willing to be a mouthpiece for the PR's who have anything useful. I know it sounds scummy, but it could save the town. Just trust me on this.
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Everyone, let me suggest some other lynch options. I for one, will likely vote for Firuz today, shortly. However, if there is nobody else you would like to lynch, I volunteer myself as a possible lynch subject should there be nobody else worthy of lynching. I am willing to risk my life for the rest of the town should it be necessary, such as a similar situation. I am vanilla, so you won't lose anything important should I be your verdict. I would love to survive, bit seeing that Helena is likely telling the truth, the town is in danger, and I want to lead the town to victory. As much as I hate to say it, if this is the only way to save the town, I will do it. Helena, please provide anything you know. If you are unwilling to, I will be willing to be a mouthpiece for the PR's who have anything useful. I know it sounds scummy, but it could save the town. Just trust me on this. Or we could just lynch her like we wanted to. I for one don't care if Hinckley doesn't tell her she can't, although I expect him to, since I don't want to play a game where we have to accommodate for selfish, unsportsmanlike jerks like her.
Twatty Tittlesteen Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Would you rather lose? She is definitely being unsportsmanlike, but do you really think she'll survive the night since killing her is part of our win conditions? What will turning the lynch away from her for one day do to us?
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Would you rather lose? She is definitely being unsportsmanlike, but do you really think she'll survive the night since killing her is part of our win conditions? What will turning the lynch away from her for one day do to us? Show her that we'll let her walk all over us for the sake of her petty temper tantrum? I for one don't enjoy giving up my dignity to douchepickles.
Nicholas Dickory Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Alright, the time has come. The Helena Hippopaw story must be told. It begins in the plains of Africa... Wait, too far back? Fast forward... Timly calls me arrogant for not properly respecting the inanity coming out of Gertrude's highly inane maws. Ah, snap. The smartest of the bunch must have been offed already, leaving the less cognisant ones. In that case, let me break it down into an Arrowroot digestible style for the mental midgets left over (and sincerest apologies to the non-mental midgets here; you are totally fine in my book, but the day has been monopolised by the vocal and stupid today. I am in no way painting all of town with the same brush). Helena Hippopaw's Great Reveal, A Play on plays Day Zero, roles are revealed. Two characters, shrouded in shadows, discuss their roles. 1: Twinned SKs? That's pretty dumb. 2: Yeah, the last ****** games, the SK was way overpowered, so this is the opposite, giving the SK to two players, but none of the benefits. 1. Who gives a shit? The SK is supposed to be unwinnable, so screw it, we are agents of chaos, favouring neither side. 2: Sounds fair. What's your strategy? 1: I'm going to act and type like a noob. It'll kill me to write such incomprehensible English, but those types always get to day five. 2: Good call! I'm gonna barely post and look scummy all the time, it should work. 1: Um... The two step into the light, and we see Purpolonia Pink and Helena Hippopaw! Shocking! Day One Helena: Who should we kill using our combined action? Pink: Eh, whatever. Helena: How about whatever his name is, the guy we kill? Pink: Yeah, sure, whatever. They won't be watched. Day Two Helena: Ariattny is a total douche. We should kill them, just to avoid having to read their crap. Pink: Yeah, Ariattny's kind of funny though. Who else? Helena: Catalina's playing. Why not them? Pink: Whatever. Day Three Helena: Post! Take part! You're going to get lynched! Pink: Huh? My acting scummy thing didn't work? Screw! Helena: Do something! Pink: I sort of am! Helena: We're paired together, so we die together. I'm gonna save you. <Helena claims something utterly vague> Helena: Scum will not touch either of us if they're intelligent. Let's see. Pink: Awesome. Thanks. Day three, scene two: X: I'm the doctor, I'll protect you! Helena: Cool! Day three, scene three: Y: I'm the vig, who should I target? Helena: Nobody! Too risky! Think of the town <snicker! > Day three, scene four: Z: I'm totally not the watcher, but I speak for them. I won't watch you tonight, but I'll let you know you were watched tomorrow. Helena: Sure, sounds good to me. You do that. Day Four Godric: Hi, I'm Godric! I've done nothing useful so far, but I will shit on everyone to feed my ego! Everyone! You're useless! Useless! I want to destroy the town! Helena: Sure thing Godric, you go do that! ~End day four ~ So, some of you may have learned I am not town through that. Even the small-brained of you, such as Godric, the noon-lynch leader. Now, the question is: why not lynch me? Well, you have two options: 1. Lynch me, and doom town. 2. Not lynch me and have a chance. Why would lynching me doom town? Because I will reveal the identity of the doctor, vig and watcher if you try to lynch me. I'll do so about an hour before day's end. In that case, town will be 100% doomed to lose. Kill me, kill the town. If you keep me alive, I'll keep it secret, and hope to be here day six, hoping that the scum hope to find a reason to not make me the kill night four. The question is, will you negotiate with terrorists? Well? Godric, you think you are a leader, want to lead the town now? So, now you've outed yourself as a wild card, eh? And you (claim to) know the IDs of the town PRs? First off, how do we know you won't turn around and share that info with the scum if we leave you be? Second, if by some miracle you swear on your mother's grave cross-your-heart-and-hope-to-die that you won't reveal that info to the scum, and they accept that they have no hope of getting you to talk, why wouldn't they kill you? If they now know that you know the town PRs and they (in my hypothetical scenario) know they can't get the info out of you, wouldn't you pose a substantial threat to them? If you do in fact have all this information, might they not want to silence you in case you stop acting like an absolute megablock head and inform an actual townie? Can you guarantee the scum won't kill you? Third, if we don't kill you today, can you guarantee the vig won't kill you? You know, the vig who you are now using as leverage against the town and is probably extremely pissed off about that? Because they (probably) trusted you enough to reveal themselves? The vig who still has the power to kill you if he/she desires? Bear in mind that if you strike preemptively and reveal the names in order to prevent one of the above hypotheticals, you blow your entire gambit out of the water and are utterly fair game, okay? And is it not slightly possible that the scum might be nervous about eliminating those whose names you claim to know, especially when everyone may end up knowing them? Seeing as how the doctor could protect the vig or the watcher, the watcher could watch the doctor or the vig, and the vig could kill you? Would it make sense for the scum to risk getting blocked/caught? And any other PRs we have may be willing to step in and keep an eye on them? Of course, this is all purely hypothetical and we should wait and see if God has something to say about this, shouldn't we? If he does, you're nicked, and if he doesn't, well, who's to say you won't get yours? Whoever you are outside this magical world, good luck getting into any mafia games in the future once people see the kind of unsportsmanlike crap you're prepared to pull. My name is Nicholas Dickory, and I nominate myself as Official Terrorist Negotiator for the District of Seks Ewe Alley. Game. F-u-c-k-i-n-g. On. Sister.
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 So, now you've outed yourself as a wild card, eh? And you (claim to) know the IDs of the town PRs? First off, how do we know you won't turn around and share that info with the scum if we leave you be? Second, if by some miracle you swear on your mother's grave cross-your-heart-and-hope-to-die that you won't reveal that info to the scum, and they accept that they have no hope of getting you to talk, why wouldn't they kill you? If they now know that you know the town PRs and they (in my hypothetical scenario) know they can't get the info out of you, wouldn't you pose a substantial threat to them? If you do in fact have all this information, might they not want to silence you in case you stop acting like an absolute megablock head and inform an actual townie? Can you guarantee the scum won't kill you? Third, if we don't kill you today, can you guarantee the vig won't kill you? You know, the vig who you are now using as leverage against the town and is probably extremely pissed off about that? Because they (probably) trusted you enough to reveal themselves? The vig who still has the power to kill you if he/she desires? Bear in mind that if you strike preemptively and reveal the names in order to prevent one of the above hypotheticals, you blow your entire gambit out of the water and are utterly fair game, okay? And is it not slightly possible that the scum might be nervous about eliminating those whose names you claim to know, especially when everyone may end up knowing them? Seeing as how the doctor could protect the vig or the watcher, the watcher could watch the doctor or the vig, and the vig could kill you? Would it make sense for the scum to risk getting blocked/caught? And any other PRs we have may be willing to step in and keep an eye on them? Of course, this is all purely hypothetical and we should wait and see if God has something to say about this, shouldn't we? If he does, you're nicked, and if he doesn't, well, who's to say you won't get yours? Whoever you are outside this magical world, good luck getting into any mafia games in the future once people see the kind of unsportsmanlike crap you're prepared to pull. My name is Nicholas Dickory, and I nominate myself as Official Terrorist Negotiator for the District of Seks Ewe Alley. Game. F-u-c-k-i-n-g. On. Sister. Still lovin' it.
Nicholas Dickory Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Still lovin' it. You may want to take some yoga lessons before you sleep with me, okay? These massive balls make for a tight fit, y'know?
Belinda Bugglesby Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Policy lynch for being a dick. Bad sportsmanship is hardly the way to go in these games, and I'll bet that Hinckley will either tell you you can't do that or nobody will let you play in their games in the future because you throw temper tantrums when you don't win. My vote stays where it is. It's not bad sportmanship, this is a game of life and death. If she wants to play this way she can, and I admire such a play. That being said, I'll hold off voting for her because of the gravity of her rant. Yet, can she even be trusted? We know that yesterday she did lie, a lot. I'm guessing that she wants to reveal these people to another one of the PR's on her list tomorrow, if she survives. Or, she can continue playing this card and blackmailing the town. Thing is, how much longer can she live? What's her point? What happens day 6 Helena? Do you win?
Helena Hippopaw Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Gertrude, you really don't get it. I'm not spoiling the game at all. I'm saying if town ends my game, I'll end town's game. Seems fair and balanced to me. A tantrum would look totally different, in my opinion. I state this as a matter of strategy, and had planned it before day three ended. Of course, you're pissed at looking foolish today, so everybody expects you to say ridiculous in your impotent rage.
Rutherford HablabbleBibble Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 You have a weird definition for being a sporting person, and there's no way the Alien Overlord would have a role like this and not have a way for you to win when one of you got killed. I'm disappeared you play like such an megablock, but I suppose we're going to have to deal with it. Anyway. How are we supposed to trust a serial killer? We have no way of knowing if you've betrayed us or not. Nothing's keeping you from giving the scum the PR identities. Hell, maybe you already have...I'd rather lose this game than comply with someone like you.
Helena Hippopaw Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 seriously, whiners, what is unsportsmanlike about playing the only card you have to survive? Play the game, hunt the scum, and don't complain about someone using tactics unavailable to you. I am a pioneer So, about 24 hours into voting, the town will have an idea of who the scum are. My gift to town. Hardliners, demanding my lynch will be scum or super dumb town. TOWN, don't vote for me. You are the majority. Save the Hippo, save the world! (That's how the sating goes, right?)
Gertrude Tincanchew Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 seriously, whiners, what is unsportsmanlike about playing the only card you have to survive? Play the game, hunt the scum, and don't complain about someone using tactics unavailable to you. I am a pioneer What is sportsmanlike about ruining a game for all the other players once you can't win anymore? Play the game, hunt the scum, and don't complain when you lose fair and square. You are a fucknugget.
Helena Hippopaw Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 I think Gertrude can't comprehend the situation. I think the saner elements of town better talk her off the ledge. In the meantime Gertrude, still waiting for your single useful action this game. I expect to wait a long time
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