The meeting in the Bar,

[Bkrosell]

Up in Northridge I went to my favorite bar witch I rarely get to do these days.

Walking in I saw a passed out solier on a table, witch made me realize for the unteenth time that most soldiers loved drinking.

"Velmyre! I didnt expect to see you." said a man in the corner.

" Do I know you?" was my reply.

"no, you dont,but my and my boys know all about you, wich reminds me,..."

" Is there a point to all this, I'd like to get my drink and go." I cut him off.

"First of all my name is Hancock,if you were wondering,and yes I have a point,but its a long story, might want more than one drink."

Hancock started talking about a Demon attacking their outpost by the bay of storms, witch is why he wanted me,

"Il do it, I'll get rid of the demon for you," I decided

" you'l need this then," he said while handing me a map.

"I'll do my best" I said as I got up out of my chair.

Before I was out the door Hancock caught my eye's,"Good luck!You'l need it."

Now to find the one person I knew who could lend me a ship,my brother.

(these pictures were changed from the original)

This is my first build in a series of builds Im working on, I hope you like it,

C&C is welcome,

Edited September 21, 2013 by Bkrosell

[Captain Settle]

Good story and nice MOC. I like the way the snow is built up around the front of the bar. It does look a bit incomplete though, maybe you could add a roof.

[soccerkid6]

Cool snow effect and I like the interior A roof would be a nice addition

[kabel]

Nice moc to finally start your full GoH experience which is actually more about building than talking Anyway, a few things you could improve:

- try to get red-brown and dark-brown tiles and tile the ground. That way your bar would look like it's got a wooden floor.

- try not to rely to heavily on prefab pieces, and get full arches instead. That way you can make the window design more interesting

- build a (modular) roof - There are several ways to do one. The easiest way are of course sloped bricks. Try to mix colors there as well. Black goes really well with dark bley which creates a slate roof effect. Red and dark red mixed create the effect of a wheathered roof tile roof. Dark tan plates simulate a straw or reed roof.

[Gideon]

Some praise: The snowy outside is fantastic, I sense great Mitgaridan building potential here! The minifig posing is also interesting.

Potential for improvement: Brickbuilt walls, or at least double layers of "prefab" pieces to avoid the paper-thin feeling those pieces give. Photography could also be improved, right now it looks like you have taken the pictures with your phone and then compressed them with paint or something which hasn't been kind to the pixels. And what is the purpose of the black area...?

[Infernum]

Nice interior!

[Bkrosell]

Some praise: The snowy outside is fantastic, I sense great Mitgaridan building potential here! The minifig posing is also interesting.

Potential for improvement: Brickbuilt walls, or at least double layers of "prefab" pieces to avoid the paper-thin feeling those pieces give. Photography could also be improved, right now it looks like you have taken the pictures with your phone and then compressed them with paint or something which hasn't been kind to the pixels. And what is the purpose of the black area...?

The black area was a mistake when I edited the picture and didn't know how to fix it, my camera isn't the best and it's to much of a hassle to use my dads because he is never around to help me with it, and just for the record I don't have a phone, I'll get right to work with improving my moc, Kabel gave me an idea for a roof, I'll try working on the wall too, Thanks. Edited September 18, 2013 by Bkrosell

[Mike S]

Not bad for a newcomer to GoH! The story sounds interesting and the MOC illustrated it well!

[HammerBro]

The story looks good! I also like how you made the snow and it works quite well. I think you could do a bit more with the interior, but you did well with the limited amount of bricks you have.

[Bkrosell]

The story looks good! I also like how you made the snow and it works quite well. I think you could do a bit more with the interior, but you did well with the limited amount of bricks you have.

Not bad for a newcomer to GoH! The story sounds interesting and the MOC illustrated it well!

Thanks both of you, I think you'll like what I've added to it, should be up by tommorrow maybe not, but keep in mind I have school 5 days a week so I don't get as much time to build as I would like.

[kabel]

good improvements, starting to look better already!

[soccerkid6]

Great work putting the suggestions you received into brick The walls look much better now and the roof makes it feel much more complete

[Bkrosell]

Great work putting the suggestions you received into brick The walls look much better now and the roof makes it feel much more complete

I couldn't agree more, the roof is the finishing touch, it completes the moc, but I must apologize for the quality of the photos, my cameras not the best.

[Niku]

Nice start, it really looks good, you probably would like to add some more height on your next one, but it is understandable that Mitgardians build low for the icy conditions so the heat is conserved.

[Gideon]

Very nice roof, that definitely improved the MOC! Although I am not sure if very many Mitgardian roofs would be flat, since the weight of snow in a harsh winter could be troublesome then

Just a quick tip to get more views if you update any MOCs in the future, be sure to also post some of it in a new post at the end of the thread or at least make a clear statement that the first post has been updated, as at least I always use the "show first unread" functionality when revisiting threads I've already started to read. In this case it was Kabel's comment that made me scroll up.

Edited September 21, 2013 by Gideon

[de Gothia]

Nice to see that you listen to the advices given to you. It is a huge improvement from the original moc. The photos could use some improvement but I understand your situation regarding the camera.

I like the snow parts, the came out very natural! Next thing to do is to work with the interior, said by others.

[kermit]

You did a fabulous job with the interior and the outside of the house especially with the snow.

[Bkrosell]

Nice to see that you listen to the advices given to you. It is a huge improvement from the original moc. The photos could use some improvement but I understand your situation regarding the camera.

I like the snow parts, the came out very natural! Next thing to do is to work with the interior, said by others.

You did a fabulous job with the interior and the outside of the house especially with the snow.

Thanks, I like doing snow which is part of the reason I chose to stick with Mitgardia,

Nice start, it really looks good, you probably would like to add some more height on your next one, but it is understandable that Mitgardians build low for the icy conditions so the heat is conserved.

Very nice roof, that definitely improved the MOC! Although I am not sure if very many Mitgardian roofs would be flat, since the weight of snow in a harsh winter could be troublesome then

Just a quick tip to get more views if you update any MOCs in the future, be sure to also post some of it in a new post at the end of the thread or at least make a clear statement that the first post has been updated, as at least I always use the "show first unread" functionality when revisiting threads I've already started to read. In this case it was Kabel's comment that made me scroll up.

Thanks niku and gideon, the roof is actually a thick brick one so it withstands the weight of the snow and I completely forgot to say I changed it, also, How do I make a link to the old picture? Edited September 21, 2013 by Bkrosell

[Gideon]

How do I make a link to the old picture?

Depends on where the old picture is located I suppose.

But what I referred to is that it wouldn't hurt if you add at least one of the new pictures in a new post in the thread (maybe even with a link to the first post) when you update the first post so we lazy users who don't scroll back to the top unless we know we have to don't miss the new pictures you've posted

[Bkrosell]

Great idea Gideon, I'll use this when I tweak future builds.

[Captain BeerBeard]

You have been offered some great advice. I think instead of criticism, we should offer advice. Anybody with me on that?

[kabel]

As long as criticism remains constructive I think its okay. I for instance always found your comments refreshingly straight which helped me a lot. So as long as criticism is acompanied with advice its the best way to help others improving.

[soccerkid6]

You have been offered some great advice. I think instead of criticism, we should offer advice. Anybody with me on that?

Advice is the most helpful (at least it has been in my experience), criticism is good, but without advice on how to fix whatever was criticized it doesn't really help the builder much.

So pretty much what kabel said, criticism with advice

[Infernum]

Wow! Much better now! Great work with the snow on the roof!

[Bkrosell]

I agree that giving advice is better then criticism unless you are criticizing and then advising them on how to fix it, oh and thanks infernum, I like the roofs snow to